If you are thinking that this is going to be a comedy based on that title - well… you are almost there. Today’s guest, Ericka Mulhall is here to share her story - or as she says #shareyourshit.
Erica got into network marketing by the living out every parent’s worst nightmare. She lost her son. She realized, while dealing with her grief and devastation, that there was nowhere she would rather be than at home with her daughter and husband. So, like all of us in times of crisis… she turned to Google.
Google told her that one of the best work from home opportunities was network marketing. So that’s what she did - and never looked back.
During this episode, you will learn
I hope that listening to Ericka will make you smile through your tears - she is a brilliant businesswoman and an amazing person. She speaks so authentically - I know you will love her as much as I do. Be sure to take notes, laugh and cry as you enjoy this episode.
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Speaker 1: (00:10)
Welcome to you're not the boss of me. If you are determined to break glass ceilings and build it your way, this show is for you. I'm your host Beth graves. And I am obsessed with helping you to not to stream it, but make the plan, connect the dots and create what you crave. Are you ready? Let's get started.
Speaker 1: (00:32)
Welcome back to episode number 56, 10 ways to lose a prospect. Probably has you thinking that this is going to be a complete comedic episode and at times it is. But when we opened this conversation with my guest Erica Mahal, she shares about coming from her darkest moment to what she calls, hashtag share the shit and helping people and women in the network marketing industry, and really in all of her communities to choose their heart. So I asked Erica how she found network marketing. And Erica has a story that is one that, that nobody ever wants to tell. And she and Ryan lost their baby Kaelin, their son. And that was, that is obviously such a dark dark moment. And how do we talk about 10 ways to lose a prospect and also about the darkest deepest moment of a woman's life. And I think that this is the message that Erica would want you to know.
Speaker 1: (01:49)
As we go into this episode is she was at work. She said that Kellen had been gone for a year and a half. And her beautiful daughter, Eloise was six months old at the time. And her husband sent a photo of the two of them playing on the floor. And she looked in the mirror and looked at herself and said, what the hell are you doing? And started to Google work from home opportunities started to read policies and procedures started to notice that women were making money and are making money in the network marketing world. So she said, well, I'm going to figure it out and I'm going to do it because her heart at the time was being away from Eloise and wanting to wanting to just embrace and breathe in every moment. So as we dive in with Erica and she talks about choosing your heart and how she helps women to understand that through struggle, they can rewrite their story.
Speaker 1: (02:57)
And whether it's on the Peloton or whether it is showing up for your network marketing business, or writing that book, or even supporting another, another female, another mom in a Facebook group, that's what Eric is all about. So I first sat down in a circle with a bunch of network marketers. We were at a retreat in Orlando and I didn't know Erica's story. I just thought, Oh, she's going to share. Cause I know that she deals with, she's had a lot of issues with her back and her knees and how she's, how she's used yoga and mindset and sitting and listening to her talk that day. It just made me realize that we are so, so freaking lucky to build the connections in the circles and to be able to, to be hearing stories like Erica is, and that she's willing to open up and share the painful moments.
Speaker 1: (03:58)
And knowing that in sharing, she's going to inspire you or get you to share your shit, choose your heart and do the thing. And so with that, I want to welcome Erica to the podcast. We are recording for this podcast. We were getting ready to record a little live, live in our, a webinar about 10 ways to lose a prospect when we're looking at the right things to do in your marketing and in your messaging, if you're building organically and making connections. And so I turned on the microphone and I said, can we record this? And so I think that, I don't think I know you are going to just love this episode. And most importantly, you will take away. I hope and Erica hopes the ability to choose your heart. So here we go, Erica and Beth in 10 ways to lose a prospect, okay. Episode 56.
Speaker 2: (05:01)
And this is a treat for you guys because I'm with my good friend and the amazing Erica Mulhall and we are planning a little webinar live, and I know that you are going to want to hear the planning part of it. And I'm also going to be interviewing her because she is a reform spammer. She she's a leader. She's a CRN like, tell us, tell us who you are, Erica. I love this. This is so great. Well, I'm a nurse anesthetist. I'm a mom. I'm a, I'm like, I love you. You're like my fluffer. It's fantastic. My emotional fluffer. So yeah, I mean, I'm a mom, I'm a CNA under Sonesta tests. I love to ride my Peloton and do yoga. And then I, you know, I'm building an empire on the side, right? And all my free time, I do want to touch on because people that are listening.
Speaker 3: (05:58)
So you're here because we're planning a session that's called how to lose a sponsor. If you remember that movie, how to lose a date or in 10 days or something, how to lose a prospect. So we're going to be talking about that and planning it for you to hear. But I first I was thinking last night about Erica coming on. And the thing that I get so often are things, things like this. And we talked in the last episode about, I'm so tired of people saying, you're going to fail. If you don't have vision, everybody wants to have vision. You're going to fail. If you're not consistent, everybody wants to have consistency. Nobody comes into these businesses and it's like, I don't have any vision. I don't, I'm not going to be consistent. Therefore I'm going to fail. What we have to learn is what happens when we stop showing up what those thoughts are, just clutter, their gremlins.
Speaker 3: (06:51)
They're saying, well, why would you show up? It won't happen for you anyway. Why would you get on that bike? Erica, you're dealing with so many health issues. Why, why are you doing this? And what I love about your story is that you have every reason in the world to make those excuses, but it wasn't. I have more vision than everybody else. It was that you learned how to recognize, notice, even honor the thoughts and then choose a different thought. So you can go into your story. But I would love for you to talk about that because I'm so tired of hearing the motivational people give up because they don't have vision. Every single person has vision. They give up why?
Speaker 2: (07:36)
Yeah. I mean, I think, Oh, this is such an such a topic for me that I really, really love because for me, I've always thought my life is hard. Like the life that I live, I've had multiple back surgeries. I turned 40 last month and I had a knee replacement last year. Like that's bananas. My son passed away seven years ago. And his presence and exit from my world has shaped everything about what I think is hard than easy. And so for me, like just my life, if I just let my life sort of flow the way things flow, that's really hard. And it's really sad. And I think that it's harder for me to stay sad and miserable than it is for me to consistently fight for happiness. So I get on my bike, even though it's hard. And I do yoga, even though it's hard and I work for happiness and it's like floating down a river would be easy.
Speaker 2: (08:38)
That's my wife, but fighting against the current, you know, to find the things that fill me up and make me happy and bring me to people like you, who inspire me. And we inspire each other is easier. Even though that sounds like a lot of work, you know, I mean, I could you're right. I could make all the excuses sit on the couch all day long and do nothing, but be sad and eat ice cream. And sometimes you do. So, um, I think that's sort of like the philosophy that I've always found. So tell me this,
Speaker 3: (09:13)
But I could not have you on the podcast without that conversation. And it is not being said to say, Oh, well, if Erica can do it, you can do it because you know, everybody has their heart. Everybody has something that's hard. That is something that you make a decision, but it's not just about waking up one day and saying, okay, I know that it's really hard to have a body that hurts, or I know that grief pushing through grief or even balancing a real job. And a daughter who is Eloise is just at home right now doing our school. So what was, if somebody is listening and they're thinking, well, okay, how do I get over hard? How do I take
Speaker 2: (09:59)
First step? Okay.
Speaker 3: (10:01)
What is it that, that you do that shifts from? This is hard. I'm on the couch, eating ice cream to choosing, to do one thing. And then another thing to get on the bike for 10 minutes, then 20 minutes to, to lead your team, to build your business.
Speaker 2: (10:18)
Ooh, that's a really good question. People ask me that all the time. And I just say, you know, one day I just put my big girl pants on. Like I just put the pants on and that was the first step. And then one day I got on the bike and then I realized that the emotional spiral, it really, it takes you down. And I have to take myself out of that spiral by thinking, well, the day that I got on my bike, I felt a lot better. So I need to just do that again. You know, and the day that I connected with other women who lifted me up, I felt a lot better than the day that I just sat alone. And I think that it's the awareness of how I felt in other places, the idea that all of these experiences come to gather in a way that helps me see the beauty and other places. And so, yeah, it was just a baby step. I don't even actually know how I did it. One day. I just, I went to a yoga class one day and found that I felt really good there. And then I just kept going and I was consistent with that and sharing my story is hard, but also when I consistently share it, it feels good to get these emotions out there and know that someone else has the same emotions. So I picked that. That's where I started it. Wasn't deep.
Speaker 3: (11:37)
And even to, to simplify it of the daily routine of going back to even something that might not serve you when you're ready to snap at a spouse or a child, and then you think, and do those thought downloads of how did that feel? Did that feel good last night, Don and I, it was such a stupid little argument. It was such a stupid thing about awake surfboard. And he said, the Marina will have it. And I know that, I know that it's, you know, Donny wants a special one. And I said, well, he's the Marina does. And he mumbled and walked away and I walked into my office and I thought I could be super pissed off right now and think, well, this always happens at it instead. I thought, okay, I'm going to choose. Instead of saying, why is he always snapping? He makes, he makes me crazy.
Speaker 3: (12:27)
Why doesn't he just understand? I thought downloaded. I chose another thought of, wow, there's a lot going on right now with a new cottage and with there's a lot going on in his life. And I'm going to choose again and not go downstairs and pick a fight and go downstairs and just choose to do something different. And that feeling and remembering the feeling of being angry or regretful or remembering that feeling of how does it feel to just choose kind. But I had to process. And that's the thing I loved. You spoke at a leadership retreat. If any of you out there ever need a speaker for your teams, for your zoom. I mean, she is. I told her like, watch out Rachel Hollis and I I'm serious when that book comes out. And when would you get all of this down on paper? But the thing that I keep thinking about, and this will go into the 10 ways to lose a prospect.
Speaker 3: (13:27)
We tend to candy coat it. Oh my gosh, you just have to have vision. You just have to make that vision board. You just have to be determined and you brought up your it's still going to be hard, but shoes. How do I want to feel in this situation and really talk a little bit about that you were in, uh, and let's, then we'll walk into your experience. You were in a company that was a lot of go, go, go, you've got this. If you've got this, let's send that those 25 messages instead of recognizing, coming from a place of authenticity. So let's just break in and we're making, we're taking notes for our lives. But number one is showing up as authentically. You talk about the raw versus being able to lean into who you are and showing up as you on social media, instead of some, like buy my crazy shoes, this is a good one. Cause it's like, you know, the copy and paste, you can copy and paste a lot of things in life. You can copy and paste how you think your emotions should be. You can copy and paste a message. And it kind of goes into the fact that I always tried to see it from both sides. Like how does it feel to even in my anesthesia career, how does it feel to be that patient? Clearly I have some experience with that. And so it's really the same
Speaker 2: (14:52)
Thing and network marketing. How does it feel to be on both sides of that message? Like I get messages all the time that I think, well, that was a copy and paste. There's no feeling behind it. So yeah, I mean, I was, I was coached in my first business to send messages that didn't have me in it. There was no emotion to connect to the person. And I realized that when I started just quick messaging, somebody like you would do when you're just sending a text to your friend that that's actually more emotion in it. You know, there's more intuition in that. And so I think that that's the biggest one is like the copy and paste as definitely the thing that made me realize I had to leave that attitude and really come from a place where you were looking at the person and say, what are they thinking on the other side? What do they need from me? How can I help them then send the message.
Speaker 3: (15:48)
So that is that's. The key is saying, everybody is your prospect. Everybody needs what you have. And I knew we didn't cover it is saying everybody needs what you have. So yes, everybody does need good skincare. Everybody does need a good vitamin. Everybody does need an essential oil, but it's going to come across. And when someone and I sent those messages, Hey, would you be open to taking a look? And the person is thinking my grandmother just fell and broke her hip. And I just posted that on Facebook and you're sending me, Hey, would you be open to take a look at my business? You rotten little spammer. And of course, then if we tell our prospects, if we, if we send that to our prospects or we tell our teams to do that, but we want to be brave and bold and asking the question, but have the, so everybody's not your prospect.
Speaker 3: (16:41)
So first of all, it's leaning into who do you serve? Who do you help? Who do you speak to? Because if you went into my menopausal empty nest group and started trying to speak to us, they'd be like, this is this young mom. Maybe she could speak about her Peloton. And we probably have some of some women in there that are dealing with X, Y, and Z, but we're not your people. How did your business change when you went from everybody needs, what I have to dialing in on that small target audience that avatar, that person, that one person that you speak to in your social media posts that you speak to in groups, how did it shift? How did your social media start attracting people to you? That actually would say, Erica, I need more information. That's everybody's dream to be able to their inbox.
Speaker 2: (17:33)
Oh my gosh. I mean, it was my dream for three and a half years to wake up in the morning and have a message that came straight from someone else. Instead of me sending a, would you like to buy my stuff? Message, you know, and what happened was I was actually on the phone with a girl who was in college and I was like, pitching my business. I was pitching myself and I hung up the phone with her and I thought to myself, I just don't know how to help her. Like, I have nothing in common with her. I can't visualize what it's like to be 20 anymore. And that was a huge moment for me where I was like, I can't help everyone. I just can't. And so what I really did is I, I had to really think about what are the qualities about myself that I like, what are the qualities about other other people that I can help based on that.
Speaker 2: (18:22)
And I really started thinking like, who are my people? Because I needed to get more clear and not that I won't help someone who's to why me, it just wasn't my message anymore. Um, and that was a huge thing for me to start realizing that we can't just like create these minions who go out and like, and say the same thing and copy and paste and post the same thing. I can't tell somebody to post what I do. They need to be clear on their mission and their purpose. So I actually wrote a mission statement. I wrote a purpose. I wrote this manifesto and that really, really helped me nail down that I have all these life experiences and we all do. And I, I really, I never liked to say that you have to have all the experiences that I do. It's like the bar, there's no bar in life experience, right? There's no measure. And so just because you haven't lost a child doesn't mean that you can't help somebody, but I really realized that I had a mission. Now I had a purpose. I, you know, I want to help people see their strengths and I help them through filling their cup and sharing their story. And, and, um, and that just really became the way that I, that people started reaching out to me. It was crazy. It was the craziest thing.
Speaker 3: (19:34)
And when, so that's number two, which is everyone is not your prospect and the copy and paste is and not being authentic. And what happens is that then when your social media, when you're working in groups, when you're talking to people and you always lean into thinking about how is this going to help my, I call her my Emily today. What did Emily wake up worrying about today is going to make Emily laugh. And how do I solve problems for Emily instead of how do I go out and collect
Speaker 2: (20:07)
People that will buy my stuff.
Speaker 3: (20:10)
So I think number three is going to be showing up on social media as the perfect Instagram model thinking, that's what you need to be in order to grow. So, so this fabricated kind of fake life, I think that we tell people to post the lifestyle posts and,
Speaker 2: (20:31)
And we don't
Speaker 3: (20:32)
Go out there and polarize and everyone, but we want to, if you think about what Oprah does, Oprah, doesn't say I'm fat. Again, this sucks and polarizing things. And even her, she's not, she's sharing her political views from an educational perspective, not from a let's polarize people, but she's saying, Hey, here's where I am. I get it. I fell off the wagon. Here's what I'm going to do. And you want to come along with me and a solution in a community as opposed to, Hey, look at my ripped jeans, perfectly filtered photo. And I'm the boss Bay building an empire, which I love saying I'm building an empire, right? We are, but talk about perfection that we show up and, and we tell people, show them all the things you're getting an earning. We love to share the success stories, but you have a beautiful way of sharing success along with, come with me.
Speaker 3: (21:34)
I really believe that it's like, so I started my, my hashtag share your shit. I hope I can say that on here. I totally good to go and share my shit with you and hashtag it because I just, I love, well, I love, I love that your book, Hey, no one take it. That's the name of it. I love you my bike. So I think what happened is that I started realizing that what people wanted from me and what they needed from me was for me to share my shit. They wanted me to, and they're listening because I'm sharing the real life hardship, but also I'm sharing the prevailing from it. The lesson I learned from it be you can come out on the other side to the light from it. And people want to hear that even though life is really, really hard that you come out on the other side, because the one thing that I think we don't want to do is share how fabulous I am and how terrible you are or how terrible your life is, like share the trip and then make you feel bad about how you're not on it.
Speaker 3: (22:37)
And so I think that it was more important for me to share my experience, what it took to get out of it and that you, they code too. There's a lesson in there. I agree. And I love share your shit. And, and I love that when I look at your social media and how you market it's sharing it. But like you said, showing how to prevail, not just when we have done, you said this, this is where I do my videos. I'm in my adjustable bed, not your back, but it's authentic. And it's you. And it allows people to say, okay, I can see myself learning and growing. And, and I, I would love to be working with a leader like that. And so let's go to number four, I'm going to let you spring number four, I've done one, two, and three, number four.
Speaker 3: (23:29)
You know, one of the things I was going to say, and even a number three. So this works really well is the idea of, okay, I've been mentored, I've been taught both ways to do this, where you just get in somebody's inbox and you throw your offer at them here it is damn. Or do you get to know them, figure out what they need and, and three messages in you give them the offer, or, you know, I've been sort of taught both of these ways. And what I've really realized is there is no perfect way to share what you've got. Maybe sometimes I use my intuition and I get up and I, and I just offer it to that. And I say, I have something that can help you. I feel like I can help you in some way, or I get to know them.
Speaker 3: (24:07)
And then I offer it. So I think that my, my point with number four is that there's no perfect way. There's no recipe to offer it. You do have to use some, getting to know somebody in order to see how you can help them cause the wrong you might get in their inbox right away and offer it. And you've scared them away. I might wait too long, the friend zone, Oh, the friend zone. That's what we can call this month. The friend zone, the friend zone. Yes. The friend zone. And here's the thing is that I want to say this because there are thousands, if not a million people that have had success going right to the message and doing the copy and paste, it's how you feel, how you show up for your business. That is important. Does this feel, does this feel good?
Speaker 3: (24:55)
And is this a business that for the longterm I want to, I want to build. And the other thing is, is it's all about your energy, the energy, the belief, and behind the message. So you and I could send the same message. And if I'm in a place of, Oh gosh, was this person going to think, well, I don't want to do this. It's received that way. Even. I know you guys are thinking energy behind a Facebook message, but there is it's around the whole picture of it that because I have so much belief and in what I do, I could send somebody a quick message and probably have more results than when I first started. And they didn't have that belief. And that's around the energy, the vibration, the excitement, just like when you talk about what you do as a team of social marketing funnels.
Speaker 3: (25:45)
And so tonight, one of our prospecting activities is inviting into a group. This is just giving you guys a little behind the scenes where we share this, we're going to go live and share the 10 ways to lose a prospect. So this was a way for our teams to say, Hey, we'd love for you to come and say to this group. Yes. It talks about our business opportunity. But also we do social marketing training inside of that group. So this could be helpful and you're open. You're not just sneaking them in, but that's a different approach than, Hey, will you watch this company video with gold falling from the sky telling you that you too can have this fabulous car? Yes. Oh gosh. Yes. Okay. I used to do those all the time. We used to do like a monthly business presentation and yes, I know exactly what you're referring to and that doesn't, that doesn't work for a lot of people and it really truly didn't work
Speaker 2: (26:44)
For me. I found that it was actually really uncomfortable to do those, even though I'm comfortable with this business model, I'm comfortable with my passion.
Speaker 3: (26:52)
Well, and I think that that brings us to the next one, which is we tell prospects all the time.
Speaker 2: (26:58)
It's easy
Speaker 3: (27:01)
And it's easy if you love what you're doing. But what I find is that we tell them it's easy. We tell them, Oh, you know, it's, you don't really even have to buy product. Instead of being honest about, yes, there are, we have systems in place, but you're going to, if you want to have a few extra dollars, it is easy to share with referrals. It can, it's easy to do that, but if you want to do what Eric is doing, right.
Speaker 2: (27:29)
Go to that, six-figure breakthrough part.
Speaker 3: (27:31)
We have to dive in and understand what is your offer? What are leads, leads are coming from your social media, from your connections. So talk a little bit about that. Have you ever been guilty? I know I have of, Oh, it's easy.
Speaker 2: (27:45)
We'll just get those first bonuses and off we go. Yeah. And I tried really hard to, to not use that word actually and use more like, I mean, what we're doing, I do believe is simple, but it is not easy. It takes consistency. And it does take the fact that I've done the work for myself. You know, there's, there is a lot of personal development involved in that. And that part is not easy. I mean, when you start to discover these things about yourself, that part I can't do for somebody, I can help you figure out how to use our automated funnel system, how to, you know, the logistics behind using the things that we have. But no, it really is not easy. Although I think when you understand the possibility, um, and my eyes were just wide open and it took me awhile to really understand this industry and the possibilities for me. And then I thought, Oh, again, my life is harder than this. It is harder to miss my daughter's ballet class because I'm at work than it would be to figure out how to share something like this. That's the part that I always come back to. What's harder.
Speaker 3: (28:57)
I love that because if I think about telling someone, the business is easy, it's simple. And it would have been way harder. If you look at I've been with the company for six years, just turning over $2 million in commissions, which credible, it would have been super hard for me to get the qualifications necessary, to go to a job that would pay me over six years, that amount of money and the amount of sacrifice that would have been.
Speaker 2: (29:25)
So the business model is simple and the business model does not discriminate against, I mean, they're not letting me in an anesthesia room.
Speaker 3: (29:33)
They are not letting me, I want to be in there. Cause I was totally like Grey's anatomy. Yeah.
Speaker 2: (29:37)
I was asking you guys like, okay, tell me about that. Tell me about that case. So let's
Speaker 3: (29:42)
Go to the next one, which is throwing money.
Speaker 2: (29:46)
Just to order, talk about that one. Ooh. Oh man. I am so guilty of this. Like I have two hands raised right now. Like, you know, the,
Speaker 3: (29:54)
Me too.
Speaker 2: (29:57)
And I kicked myself for how many times? I, so my previous company, there were fees associated with being a customer. And I was like, Oh, I'll pay that for you if you just order. And that seems like the answer then, because I got, I collected customers like you used that word. That's such a great word. I was collecting customers, but I wasn't collecting any money because I was constantly like, Oh, just order it. And I'll give you money back. And not only did that cheapen my brand, it cheapened my offer and what I could give them, because truly I now realize that I can give somebody an incredible community. I can give somebody an incredible team. I can give them, you used this word the other day, a success path. And I loved that because throwing money at somebody is just collecting them to put them on my list so that I can post on social media, that I have this many customers and I have this many people, but I didn't do anything for them. So that, that idea of giving money away is something that I have learned through, you know, manifesting money and learning that my abundance came from not giving, not, not throwing money at them and not throwing product at them and truly helping them see the value of what they have in terms of if they're joining a business or if they're joining us customers.
Speaker 3: (31:15)
And I love that too, because when you throw money at somebody, yes, it, it says to them like it's desperation. They don't have any skin in the game and it's also, and it's okay to have an offer at some time. That is your unique and irresistible offer to say, Hey, if you do this, I'm going to where you're going. I'm going to throw in some, some extra X, Y, and Z. That's what I have for my VIP customers this month, but asking somebody, begging them. And we also go to only hear from you at the last part of the month,
Speaker 2: (31:49)
I was just going to say,
Speaker 3: (31:50)
Just so I never want to hear from someone, Hey, I have a goal to meet. So I'll do this for you. I want to know the value. What, what is it about your product, what it is, what is it that I, why I need to have it. And also this goes to, um, why, what is irresistible about an offer? And I'll tell you, the person that I've been the longest term customer with is my friend Kim. And it is because she is always she's she's with Rhodan and fields and I love lash boost. So she is always just, Hey, checking in, we've got this special going on. Did you see this? And then she's providing me value with other ways that I can take care of. She knows that I have a skincare line that I use. So she's not pushing things that I don't need, but she's, she will also sit and share with me the value of exfoliation with microdermabrasion.
Speaker 3: (32:47)
I saw this article, but then she checks in and make sure I don't get products that I want. She's just exceptional connection and customer service. And that to me is irresistible. Does she offer me things for free? No, like she's, she will, if there's a sale that the company is doing and when she screwed up, what, and she didn't screw up, it was the wrong, it went to the wrong address. She was able, she fixed that and said, Oh, I guess you could have an extra thing that was thanks to corporate. So that to me is how you keep retaining customers, not throwing money at them and not constantly saying, Hey, if you buy this, I'll give you 5,000
Speaker 2: (33:28)
Lollipops. Yeah. And I think maybe this could go into the next one. I don't know what you have index on your list, but it's the idea of continuing to be engaged with someone, even though they may not serve you at that moment. Like, it's not all about you, you know, it's this, um, you send a message, someone replies back to you and they suddenly haven't served your purpose. So what do you do? You go see them, you disappear or you give them like a thumbs up emoji, you know, because now you're like, Oh, I don't need them anymore. They haven't served me. So she clearly is still serving you and you, you are serving her, but you've made up this relationship based on both of you instead of just her needs. So that's a really beautiful way that she's done that.
Speaker 3: (34:12)
It's a relationship driven business. And also when you say, um, stop engaging when they no longer are your prospect is you got a referral based business. So how do you collect those referrals, new people. And so, even though I'm not in the market right now to buy a house, my friend, Sarah, who is really in the market for people to hire her as a realtor, she's not, she hasn't ditched me, but she is asking me questions, checking in. And once a month, she's like, this is, I check in once a month with all of my really connected friends. How can I serve you?
Speaker 2: (34:54)
Is there anything that I can do to help
Speaker 3: (34:55)
You? And if you know of anyone that is coming into town or needs needs X, Y, and Z, I'm their girl. And once a month she asks me what she can do. Can she post something about my products to share? How can she help me? And then I'm always posting inside of groups. If you need a realtor, she's your person. So that's so important.
Speaker 2: (35:20)
Well, I mean, that probably goes along with the idea that I used to be told, send out 25 messages a day, blast out messages. I always tell my team desperation is not a good color on it. It's like, you know, on the 30th of the month, you're sending out 25 messages. But what we really to do is just continue to develop the relationship. And no matter if it's one message a day or 25, because keeping them close because your friends it's like dating. It really is. I met my husband on match.com. It's like dating somebody. You have to continue to get to know them. And then you create this know, like trust factor, where I know people who, I mean, they come to me because they've gone to my page and they can see what I'm about. And because I try to always present my authentic self in and outside of a message.
Speaker 2: (36:10)
So I got a little off track there, cause I wanted to say that, but you know, don't. Yeah. I mean, I think I sent you one idea where I said, you know, don't become the girl who only talks about her boyfriend. Don't become the girl who only talks about her vitamins, her skincare, her eye cream, her lashes, because you have to be more dimensional than that. And that was another thing that I learned coming from my previous business to here is that dimension is what people want. You know? I mean, we all stock each other on Facebook or on Instagram. And I like to think that when people come to my page, they see that I'm about a lot of things. And so maybe that's intriguing. Maybe they want it. That's why I want to get to know people.
Speaker 3: (36:54)
Well, and I had a moment. So when in 2014, before I knew better, I wore that little headset around my neck and I'd be at the grocery store and I'd be listening to every call and every city, no boundaries in my business, every single person, they said they wanted to talk. I was there. I was talking and I had somebody say to me, yeah, that's cool. But I don't want to be walking around publics, wearing a little headphone thing and being thrived central. And I became that girl that, that was everything I talked about. Even on social media. And people want to know that I will be honest and say, this is, this is the amount I worked this business during these hours. But they also want to know that, right? The dimension of who you are, I have more customers because I will, I'm on the tennis court four days a week. And someone says, what do you do? I say to them, I help people to be able to not deal with knee issues on the tennis court.
Speaker 2: (37:57)
So I started nutritional supplement.
Speaker 3: (37:59)
So that's the key too. And it's having the, Oh gosh, there was, there's a game that people play. It's, there's a number to it. And I can't even remember it. Somebody put, somebody share this with me on Instagram, but it's every conversation turns back to that person. Right. So we used to joke around in the horse world that somebody that had this, everything we turned back, Oh, Oh, that reminds me of when. Oh. And it goes back to that one topic. Like, I don't even want her to come to dinner with me cause she is going to talk about that thing. So yes. Be a human and ask more questions and listen more, have them walk away. Wondering what is it that she does? This is mysterious. She's not telling me what she does, but she just asked me a few questions. And then you can do a little dripping of clues.
Speaker 3: (38:54)
The same goes, right. I mean, I used to make, I used to beg people to get on the phone with me so that I could like tell them my why and tell them my story. Now. I like, I like to kick myself enough face for that. Cause I think my, why doesn't even matter. I mean, it's how I got here, but I never asked them any questions. I would just talk for 20 to 30 minutes. And then at the end I'd be like, so did you have any questions? Did you want to join? No, it was that. And, but it does get back to like the boundaries and the like, is this easy? Is this hard? Is this simple? I mean, I think it's so much. And if you want to use the word easy, it's easy to say that you have a product that helps you with your knee on the tennis part.
Speaker 3: (39:41)
Same as I have a product that helps me get off the couch and be a mom. You know, that part is easy. I think we can say that these all kind of blend together, I think a little bit. But if I run around with my phone, to my ear all the time, that does look hard. So I don't do that either. And I always, sometimes I would say, I work in, this is a leadership tip, layer your leadership. So if you want to provide, like we do a working zoom at nine o'clock Eric and I switch off Thursdays. What we used to do, we switch up. No, we're now more noon, but so really two Thursdays a month where the only night that I would be in my office, cause tonight we're ones, we're gonna record one, stream this into our group so we can be with, I wanna watch tennis tonight. And so, Oh yes, automation. It's another way to lose, to lose teammates is to not teach them how to be automated and efficient because I've had none of that. I got to share this. You're going to laugh.
Speaker 3: (40:40)
I wish you were. So when we did one of our lifestyle getaways, some of them had husbands that were there would, they were out on the balcony and they were yelling emergency team, call emergency team. Did everyone like drop their stuff and run? Yes, because we would be like, everybody is an emergency team call Erica. I literally dialed into a corporate call at 10 30 at night in the middle of a conversation with my husband because I wouldn't, I had this FOMO and that is what not to do that. No one wants to vent. And I've got to share one more thing with you. When you talk about sharing your story validation and three way chats, even a three way calls are really, really important. But we used to teach that why? So the structure used to be just me getting on the phone and sharing, well, this is what happened for me.
Speaker 3: (41:38)
And this is what happened. And then I did this and then I did this thing that I did that. And can you imagine going to buy a car and having the car salesman say to you? Oh, well then I started with a sun Sunbird and then I decided this and then I drive, I drive this and you'd be like, well, I'm here for a car. So we've even shifted in sales to an Ella was asked permission if, to say, I think that my experience could help you to see how that would work, but nobody wants to get on the phone. I used to get, I don't any more. Can you share how you can make a million dollars in network marketing? Nobody wants to hear that. They want to know, can I do it well, will you help me figure this out? And will I make some money and probably am I going to look like one of those spammy weirdos? If not. So if that three way call function has to be, tell me, what has you curious? I would love to know you're looking at the business and thinking that this could be a fit. What are the things that would really need to be in place for you to fall in love with an online portal to you and getting to know that and asking those questions is so important. So yes, that three way call up. So day one, and then I earned my car and I want to apologize to anybody that
Speaker 2: (42:58)
No, I would apologize to a lot of people right now to just send it out. Let's just apologize. You know, what what's really funny is that someone showed up in my inbox recently and I realized that I had already had a message sent to them in my former life and my farmers, family life. And I read that message and I was like, Holy moly. I can't believe she's still following me. And the first thing I said backwards, I just have to apologize for that passage because that was some stuff that was terrible. And what I realized now, and I was telling my team this last night that my, my process has changed even in the last year and a half where I used to use these prerecorded messages because I could send them out very fast and I could tell my story and that worked for a little while.
Speaker 2: (43:46)
Right? Automation, I'm all about it because I love it. But I also realized that those weren't working anymore either because they were not tailored to the person. And so now I basically have like four, four questions I asked, you know, are you looking to make more income? Are you looking to work less? Are you looking to be home more wait for their answer? Then I say, can I share with you a little bit about how I've done this? And I tell like my two minute version, not a 20. And then I say, can I tell you more about how I use social media? Like always asking the question and relating it back to them to help you, you know, not be spammy and be home. And those have been really successful for me to share the story in bits and pieces, but mostly share about them. Like I'm telling their own story. I love it.
Speaker 3: (44:36)
I love that. And it's so, it's so true. Okay. So we're going to wrap up this podcast so that we can go over to our live and I'm going to actually post our live over on my YouTube
Speaker 2: (44:47)
Channel for people that are not, won't see it inside of the private group so that you can see how we've put it together and give us reading.
Speaker 3: (44:57)
But what I want to end with you sharing what has been one transformative book podcast? It doesn't not mine. I know I'm transformative.
Speaker 2: (45:10)
Somebody that you heard speak
Speaker 3: (45:11)
An event that kind of just shifted things in your life.
Speaker 2: (45:16)
Oh, okay. So last year I think it was last year now I went to the rise business conference in Charleston and it was Rachel Hollis's conference. And I, there were so many incredible speakers, but the one that spoke to me the most was Trent Shelton. And it was because he shares his shit. He shares that he has one, he has gone through something. And so it really spoke to me the way that he, he went back and forth between the present and the past and helping people sort of see what's going on in their lives. And so I follow him a lot because I, I also feel like in a lot of ways, sports and being in healthcare, you know, being the best of your, of your fields really speak to me too. So I think that's why I like him. But Trent Shelton he's been, he's been, I think one of the most inspirational I cried during his speech. I got so emotional when he would talk about prevailing and, and finding your purpose. Cause for me, that was what really shifted a year ago was when I figured out, what am I doing here, this world, in this world with my experience.
Speaker 3: (46:25)
Oh, thank you for sharing that. And interesting. When you think about one decision, one move can shift your entire team is that event showed up and I bought tickets and I wasn't able to go. And so I had heard, uh, Kristin had said, Hey, well, there's this, we've got these two new, these two new women that are really, I think they're really int jump in and we almost canceled the whole thing altogether. And I said, you know what? Instead of the house, I'll just, I'll just do a hotel,
Speaker 2: (46:58)
Right? You pay for a hotel.
Speaker 3: (47:01)
I had never met you. I had no idea, but that's the second thing too. That's happened. This is, this is why I'm mentioning it. Because my intuition is saying last year
Speaker 2: (47:10)
I had a retreat that two people couldn't come to. So they decided not to come. They're kind of unplugged from the business.
Speaker 3: (47:17)
And so they were able to have two other people come to that retreat. And that retreat, that moment of one cancellation, two cancellations were what has the entire business for Terry and for Sarah who were the two came in as replacements. And so many times it's just moments like that, that you don't know where you're going to be, how it's going to play out. God will put his hand on you and say, Nope, you're not going back these three. And I think that bonding time for you three was really important as well. So be open to looking at, I don't know, they're just little moments, but yeah, Erica, I agree. I was very open when I opened an email and found that there was a better way out there, you know, to, to share something. So yeah, absolutely. I love it. Love it. Love it.
Speaker 3: (48:06)
Thank you for being with us today and thank you for being our, I thought record behind the scenes. It's perfect. And this has been such, I know people will take away so much from you sharing your, sharing your heart and then sharing the moments of how did it, how do I feel when I get off the bike? How do I feel when I show up? When I actually do that push and so follow Erica, she shares, she shares her shit. Instagram. Where can they find you on Instagram? Oh gosh. It's Erica underscore mall hall. I would love you to share your shit. Oh yeah. Share, share your shit. It's coming out. I just named it and put it out into the world. So if you have idea RV for the tour, right, you would drive my RV. Maybe the book could be the stories of people that share. They share their shit with you. So if you got a story, let Erica know we're putting a book together. I want to hear it. I want to hear it. Thank you. Welcome. And I'll see you guys next week.
Speaker 1: (49:11)
Thank you so much for being with us today. And I hope that you enjoyed hearing us go back and forth on our stories on what we have done to lose prospects. How, how all of us are shifting in the network marketing industry. But most importantly, I know that hearing from Erica and hearing her share that story, that isn't the story anyone wants to share again and again, but she chooses to share in order to help women to take the step, even though it might feel hard. So I encourage you today to relisten and to that part where she talks about choosing your heart. So what is your heart? Is it hard to reach out to someone? What if it was Erica, you were reaching out to who just looked in the mirror and thought you, you need to be home with Eloise. What if it was me?
Speaker 1: (50:10)
Who was way beyond that, that baby age? Cause I was able to stay home, but we needed to shift. We needed a shift. We were in a big financial transition and it was that message that I, that allowed me to rise up and get my voice back. So I had a phone call this week with a friend and we were chatting about community service hours. And she said, Oh gosh, it's just, it's like Groundhog day around here. I'm just so bored and I'm not doing anything. And I thought about how incredibly, incredibly connected I feel because of that zoom with Erica because of a business because of this community. And I just want to say, I am so grateful and thank you so much for being a part of the, your, not the Boston, me community, the camp elevate community and wherever we have met in the interweb world. I'm so incredibly grateful. So my coach, Susan Hyatt has a hashtag day maker challenge going on and I love to win. So I am going to do the day maker challenge right here
Speaker 3: (51:24)
On this podcast. So
Speaker 1: (51:27)
I would love for you to do this. The day maker challenge is doing something that makes someone else's day. That means whether it's sending flowers or last week, I was able to send Melissa's baked. Good, cut, little, those little cupcakes to a few friends. I sent some flowers. I send some affirmations in text and it became just obsessive of whose day am I going to make today? There's a book it's called day maker. I ordered it at some back order, but there's a story behind it with the Aveda salon, but I want you to be a hashtag day maker. So today do something beautiful, do something that is going to be a surprise and make someone's day and hashtag it day maker
Speaker 3: (52:17)
Also hashtag not my boss, hashtag not my boss and
Speaker 1: (52:24)
N O T M Y B O S S. You can also tag me, share it in your story. So let me know what you did. Did you send a text? Did you send an I, did you send some flowers and what I am going to do for anybody that does that hashtag I am going to do a drawing for a free coaching session with me a 30 minute coaching session where we can look at your daily plan. We can look at your network, your marketing, we can, we can do whatever you want to do during a 30 minute coaching session with me. You'll get that for free. And I'll also be doing some fun day maker giveaways for you day makers out there in the world. So with that, I want to say, go make someone's day. And also I've got to give a little plug to this in just a few weeks.
Speaker 1: (53:12)
I have a brand new free masterclass coming up called monetize your message. I am, I've been working on this for the last, I don't know, six weeks. And it is so good. And I wait for you all to be in the monetize your message so that you can learn to go out there and hashtag, as Erica said, share your shit, but do it in a way that's connecting to grow your leads and have eyes on your business that are qualified people, just like Erica, who were looking in that mirror that day and said, you've got to figure out a way to get home. Cause there's millions. There's millions of unicorns out there on your social media. So if you would like to get on the list for the challenge, there is a link below and it is Beth Holden graves.com forward slash masterclass. But what I will tell you to do is get in camp elevate because once you're in camp elevate, or once you're on my email list, you are going to know exactly what to do because it is in a private, a little private popup group.
Speaker 1: (54:16)
So we can pop the bubbly together. We can learn some new things and we can hang out. So that is a lot for the intro and the outro I gave you the big intro we popped the next part of the episode in, and now I'm saying farewell, be a day maker, no boss. Talk to hashtag tag me and also get on the list for the masterclass. I'll see you all next week. Thank you so much for hanging with me today on the podcast. And remember you can create what you create. If you're looking for a supportive sisterhood, I would love to see you over in our free Facebook group. As most of you know, I love camp. It's part of, you're not the boss to me because when we're building this thing, we're doing this thing. We need a supportive sisterhood and I also crave more fun and more connection. Join us at camp over in the Facebook world, the camp elevate group.com or just click on the link below. And we will see you around our campfire and help you to create what you crave.